So I may not look like 18 year old Abby anymore, well at least my body doesn’t. I still have the same baby face I always have, I am supposed to end up appreciating this fact but it hasn’t happened yet…check back when I turn 40 and ask me again. At this very moment as I type my wedding day is exactly 4 months 9 days 20 hours 47 minutes and 5..4..3..2 seconds away. Not a whole lot of time to get back to 18 year old Abby shape. Back when I felt like I was probably at my peak physical fitness I was a two sport athlete and could pretty much eat whatever I wanted to and had a fairly high metabolism. I was also sporting short hair and a nose ring back then and only had one tattoo. The summer before I went off to college I was feeling really great and had already been warned of the freshman 15 that girls apparently gain their first year in college but I wasn’t too worried.
Well freshman year came and went and I actually lost weight instead of gaining, I blame that on the terrible cafeteria food. Now I have no nose ring, long hair, four tattoos, and an extra pound or 10. Six years doesn’t seem like a lot of time but I have changed a lot since then. I have never been embarrassed of how I look and try and embrace my body type as much as any girl does. I have never desired to be really skinny or look like the models I see in Sports Illustrated, and I am not saying its a bad thing to want those things I just personally always wanted to be fit. Plus I have a serious love for yummy food, wine, whiskey and beer. Oops. Now at 24 I am definitely not as fit as a should be which brings us up to speed.
When Alex proposed 4 months ago now I remember getting a lot of advice for preparing for the wedding and one of the biggest was “don’t set unrealistic expectations for weight loss” I agree whole heartedly with this fact. I want to feel my most beautiful on my wedding day but that doesn’t in my opinion mean I need to weigh 100 pounds. I feel most beautiful when I have a little makeup on (definitely mascara) and I am wearing my baggy ripped jeans and a t-shirt. Now on my wedding day I may no have these clothes on but I will have the same attitude, I feel beautiful when I am being myself, and I think Alex would agree.
I want to be more fit by the time the wedding comes, which means going to the gym, which I hate because to me it is so boring ( I realize not everyone feels the same sentiment as I do) I would much rather get in shape playing sports. Beauty is different to everyone and in my personal opinion you need to set goals for yourself to feel your most beautiful (as long as its healthy) and don’t try to make yourself into anyone that doesn’t feel genuine. Beauty is more than just what size you are it is WHO you are that makes you beautiful, and I can honestly say my future husband makes me feel insanely beautiful, which is pretty darn great.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.